Feb 20, 2014

If you only had 20 minutes

Tomorrow I will be getting in a rental car and driving 7+ hours to say a final good-bye to another family member.  It's a drive that I don't want to make.  It's a drive that I didn't expect to have to make just six months after losing my dad.

I made that drive for him and now I am making that drive for his beloved wife of 28 years.

I found out today that once I'm there, I can only have 20 minutes of visit time.  How do you wrap up 28 years with someone you love in only 20 minutes?  Do I start with  "thank you for marrying my dad!"  or "remember that time you made me a prom dress..."

What would you say to someone who has been a pivotal part of your life, who guided you, loved you, and taught you, if you only had 20 minutes?

I will probably say nothing more than "I love you and thank you" and those words, although they can be powerful at times, they seem so small in a situation like this.

I am devastated.


Laura said...

Amy, I know there are no words to bring enough comfort for all of the heartache you have had to endure. What a blessing though that they will soon be together again. Your dad will be waiting for her. May God be with you on this journey.

Susan F. said...

Sweetie, I am so very sorry for this additional heartache for you. I know you won't see this until you get back home. You have so much more than 20 minutes. You have the rest of your life to honor your Dad and stepmom. You can say how you feel by the life that you live from this day forward. Keep being the wonderful mom you are to your girls in her memory -as you make memories for the time when those precious ones say 'until later' to you.
Again- I am so sorry.

Sheri said...

I am so sorry. Be safe and may God go with you and supply you with the right words and comfort.

Julie said...

So sorry for you. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

beth jillette said...

I will pray for you. It sounds lame but lately gratitude has helped me through some very difficult times.
You are an amazing person,you will know what to do.

Linda M. said...

Sometimes it's the things we don't have to say that are the most important. Your very presence will say more than your words could. And when you get there, I think you'll find the right things to say and do.
We never have enough time with the people we love but remember that she and your dad will walk with you forever. They are part of you and of your children and for as long as you honour what they gave you, they'll be with you.

clara said...

I think your biggest comfort will be found in whatever comfort you give her. Remind her that she has people here and "there" who love her. Tell her she did good and was good in her life. Help her remember that because she is good she has a lot of good still coming to her. You are going to be sad. It is a really hard loss. But she will always remember how good to her when she was moving on. Her peace and comfort will bring you peace and comfort. Bless your sweet heart! Saying goodbye is hard. Hugs.

Shel said...

I agree with what another wrote above - that you have all your tomorrows to 'say' what you want and honor both your Dad and stepmom. Thinking of you and sending positive thoughts and prayers your way.

Sarah Ogden said...

May the Lord bless and keep you. And may your memories wrap a blanket of love around your heart
Hug to you and yours

Gizgad said...

So sorry for your loss. Our family recently went through the deaths of my husband's Dad, Sister & Mom in just a 5 month period. It is so hard! Just take it one day at a time. You & your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Lori Cody said...

Very sorry for your loss.
My Mom died suddenly just over a year ago and my sister 5 months later.
I have also suffered with depression and the black hole.
Crafting is how I deal with my troubles.
Good luck to you. Feel better soon!

Sharon-The OKI StampQueen said...

Amy--you and yours are in my thoughts and prayers.